I Can Not Plan Ahead With Fibromyalgia … But I Can Not Be Spontaneous EitherMalik Qasir
Fibromyalgia – Many people who know me know that I am not very good at spontaneity. Not because it’s not really cool and interesting, but because it takes a lot of time and preparation to do something or go anywhere.
I Can Not Plan Ahead With Fibromyalgia
For example, if you texted me in the morning and asked if I wanted to meet you for lunch (I can’t get up and leave for breakfast on time), I have to think about the time I had to get up and leave. Calculate the time you need to shower and rest in the morning (i.e. I will have to rest after washing and sleeping and many other times of the day). Then I will have to check if I feel able to do it and understand if there is enough proximity to be able to get home quickly if necessary.
We also have to think of something else: take medicine and a bottle of water, if it’s close enough not to enjoy the ride, if there is public transport to get to the place we meet , if I need my cane or walker, or if I need someone to come with me, then I need to know how long I will be there, if there are chairs, not too many stairs, no elevators or escalators, too much black. As grim as it sounds, too,
A complete list, right? So much so that I think he will be outside for lunch and go home to prepare his dinner before deciding whether to accept the surprise invitation he kindly extended to me. Also, don’t think that I’m just appreciative that you care and want to spend time with me, that is not the case at all. As soon as I receive your call or message, I would like to jump and run, my body will not allow it.
And from what you’ve just learned, you will be forgiven for thinking that it is easier for me to schedule meetings, departures and tours in advance, and so on. incorrect! Fibromyalgia is an unhappy entity that, regardless of what I do, is never satisfied with me. If I were a woman, to make my life so miserable and unpleasant and generally cruel and unjust, I would be divorced! Unfortunately, he refuses to leave his most impressive facilities and therefore, as a foreigner who never leaves, I stick with that.
So, that’s the issue of fibromyalgia programming to come: I never know what I’m going to think any minute, and even if we prepare our scheduled midday date in advance, there is still a good chance that you will have to cancel in yourself at any time until it arrives. I’m sorry, I know you really want to see me because I’m pretty cool and all, but the fibro is always in control, whether I like it or not. And he’s just totalitarian!
I still need to weigh the vast list of possible problems and decide if I can handle everything in order to try to keep our meeting scheduled. I promise not to make excuses and try to avoid you, and I apologize that my chronic pain and fatigue in your life makes me such a demanding person. First of all, I don’t want to be, I understand that you still want to want to be near me anyway, because a lot of people have left me over the years and it hurts. Know that it means that you are precious to me if I see it, or even if I try to see it. Or you owe me money. I smile, I didn’t do it because my fibro won’t let me work anymore.
And you have it there. It cannot be accidental and it cannot plan for it! At least that makes me seem enigmatic and mysterious, right? no? Of course, I will lie. Send love